Moving on to other things

The boys start back at school today.  Brian always jokes around that there is a collective celebration from mom's everywhere after vacation.  i am not rejoicing, we had a good vacation, but I can say I am looking forward to not having to figure out lunches. Can you believe it? That's my only gripe!  Rarely do the boys want the same thing (unless it is fast food) so it is always a chore to pick it out. Plus, with it being so cold outside, they haven't had a lot of activity. Just those damn computer and PS 3 games.  We did play Bop It for hours, but that isn't physical.

Today I will be heading out to Costco with a friend as I have to buy a years supply of Zyrtec for Riordan. We went to get his allergy testing and found out he is allergic to tumbleweeds, grasses, molds, dogs and cats.  There are some other things that showed up as 1's and 2's, which she said could produce higher allergies later. I am hoping he just grows out of the asthma from his allergies!


I am starting to look at the pros and cons of bamboo flooring again.  We have hesitated getting new flooring because we know eventually we will be remodeling our kitchen, and I want to find a flooring that we can match up with the kitchen later.  Or add to if we do any major remodeling.  Our biggest con is the way it scratches, and with a dog that has long claws (even after they are trimmed, she has a long quick), I fear that my OCD will go into overdrive with any type of scratch!  I just know the carpet has got to go downstairs.  It's interesting to read up on bamboo.  I know it's environmentally friendly, as the bamboo grows so quickly, but I didn't know about the dangers of formaldehyde from some manufacturers, or about the labor in China can be seriously WRONG.  So, I get to ask about that when looking at different manufacturers.  I also know I don't like the bleached bamboo look, but the stained look.  Other than that, we are starting from scratch.  Brian wants to install it (one of the easiest to install) but I am looking at how much it would cost to have someone install it for us, just as a backup.

Other than that, the only other big project we will do this spring is putting our patio in.  FINALLY.  So, I am also trying to get quotes on that project, too.

Off to wake up the boys!  Here's hoping they don't protest too much!

Another one bites the dust! Goodbye 2010!

Happy New Year! The New Year doesn't mean much as I don't make resolutions, don't stay up until midnight, and don't drink on New Years Eve. However, it's the start of new seasons, new beginnings in other areas, so I say again...Happy New Year!

Today my two younger children had school for two hours for assessment testing and then they are off again tomorrow. They already had two weeks off previously!  How do working parents manage? I am not sure, but it probably involves working something out with day care. How do they get them to school and back with the day care?  More than I would want to deal with!  It was nice to have a nice breather, whatever reason.  Ran around and did errands like a mad woman with the two hours I had, as the oldest IS back in school.

Christmas, Riordan's Birthday and New Years went well. We had a lovely dinner at our house with my parents for Christmas. Dad had made some videos that included Riordan as a baby, along with some other festivities. Video captures so much more! A lot of fun for all of us to watch. Mom tricked me and put a heavy brick along with my present, so we had a good laugh over that. (I had asked for a giftcard) ha! This year was especially special because the boys really put in some thought about what to get me this year. It brought tears to my eyes!

For Christmas Eve we went to our old church. It's the first time I have been in the church where I didn't feel anger. Lovely service and I was glad we went.  Not sure if I'm ready to go back there continuously, but I would listen to another sermon by the new pastor.

Although I didn't make any resolutions, I did tell myself I would write more in this blog rather than my private one.  I am writing almost daily there, but just needed a break from making sure what I wrote was fitting for others eyes.  It was nice just to WRITE.  Anyway, I hope to be writing here more often. 

In a few days Brian and I will be celebrating our 16th Anniversary.  16 years.  Wow.  I even have a hard time imagining so much time has passed.  We sit in bed and recall things from the earlier years and when we were dating and although look back fondly...we are so glad we are where we are today. 

Here's wishing you a prosperous New Year.  I pray for better news daily, my mom's continued good health, the job market to get better, the boys to stay healthy and for my hubby and I to make it to another year. ;)

Where is my place of zen?

I am going batshit crazy over here! Birthday tomorrow, Christmas on Saturday ....I need a Xanax!

Life...it will get you everytime!

Highs and Lows

Today was a very hard day. I went to my friends funeral which they call a "Celebration of Life", but it was hard nonetheless. The saying goodbye ...missing someone. Doing too little, too late. I knew the end was near but stayed away because it was too close to home. I felt guilty because my mom is doing well, and she wasn't. Same cancer, same stage. What else is there left to say? So, with the guilt and the sadness, I said goodbye to a lovely woman that motivated me, inspired me, and made me wonder the beauty of life and absolute unfairness of it all. Why not a miracle? It's interesting because that was brought up at the funeral. How she never gave up and how the fact that we knew her and her struggle ...and her amazing relationship with God...she WAS a miracle. It was a lovely service. I am glad I went.

After the service I went to the school and brought Birthday treats for Riordan for an early Birthday celebration. Since his birthday's during Winter Break, we have to celebrate early. He LOVED it. He is such a mini me. Extreme high. I am so grateful to be be able to attend these fun parties for my son's! It made his day and I love helping him have a great day!

Later this week we have the Holiday Bazaar and the Christmas Party to prepare for. So much to do but so much fun to celebrate! So, long story short, I am exhausted. Wish I could sleep for a day.

Christmas is....

As another Christmas approaches, I get to contemplate. I have been so busy with the boys school activities, donating my time, redoing my family room (whoever says staying at home is boring obviously isn't doing it right...ha!) that I have to MAKE myself stop and reflect on the little things so I still appreciate Christmas. We get so wrapped up in Holiday parties and shopping that I feel we really need to stop, take a breath, and just enjoy each other. Last night we all got bundled up and went to our town's Festival of Lights. Expecting the older two to throw a fit, I was holding my breath, waiting for the outcries that they were too old. Nothing came. Not even a single complaint about dressing warmly! We all shuffled in the car, parked and then walked to the main street. Watched the street fill with people...huddled together for warmth. As we watched the floats go by, people would yell, "Merry Christmas!" and we would yell it back. I watched the boys have fun being kids. I appreciate that this might be our last year playing Santa, so we are revelling in the magic. I have the Christmas story brought out, just getting ready to read. Brian took Daegan out shopping today and Daegan came home with a huge smile on his face. Not only did he get to spend time with dad, but he got to get "really cool things for the family". He loves the picking out, and loves the anticipation of his brothers opening their gifts. Too much fun! As the boys get older, I tell them...

Christmas
is
enjoying each other
being thankful we are all together
counting our blessings
caring more about other's happiness over our own
sharing love
sharing Christ
loving one another
giving to those in need
swallowing pride
forgiving
remembering...

R.E.S.P.E.C.T

We have a teenager. That explains so much to so many. I am at this point where I wonder if I change tactics or keep on keepin on. I value the idea to allow him to speak his mind, but at what point does it become disrespectful to the parent? Same attitude, everyday. I love him with every ounce of my being. He is a joy to me in so many ways. Is it wrong for me to want to ship him off until he's 22? How to instill the idea to do for others because it makes them happy? Is this where someone points out that he is a teenager and the world revolves around him? Do I just accept that and wait until this stage is over?

I love it that he has the mentality that "they will like me for who I am or it's their loss". I love it that he has his own taste in music, his own career path, his own WAY. If he could just give with a happy heart. Is that a parenting failure or something that just IS? I tell my friends to not compare their children. Each one has their own personality. I have a people pleaser who wants to make others happy, a headstrong who says stay outta my way and a lover who is happy when others are happy. Trying to figure out discipline styles for each one while establishing and nurturing their love language is so hard!

I see all around me couples having babies and the only advice I have to them is to be consistent and love them deeply. This is the easy part. ;)

choices

Lately, i have been rethinking staying at home.  When initially making the decision, a lot of things were weighed. less money to do fun things. it would take longer to remodel our home. the house we buy would be smaller so we lived within our means.
i go back and forth because lately, the boys are wanting more and more. a new room they don't have to share. a laptop. things that cost money. we can no longer please them with a package of hot wheel cars.

it always comes down to material things.

i made a choice to be home for my kids. so if they call me from school because they are sick, i can be there in two minutes. if they had a rough day, i am there for them to talk to about it.

is it more important for me to be here when they need me? to have seen every tear, every first milestone, everything??? for me, yes. i wouldn't have changed anything. we all make choices about what is best for our families. mine is to continue to be home. I don't want to miss a thing.

The month of March and all that comes with it.

I have started working again!  Yay!  My body says, "Booo!"  Feeling the burn in every inch of my body, but that is normal.  It's interesting how before I would hate the feeling, and this time I know it's because I am working out my muscles, getting my body in shape.  I just might be ready for time at the gym. 

This past week I have been moving shrubs out of the protective hoop houses and out into our display area.  I love working on this project because there is order and consistency while working with my coworker Lisa.  Yesterday we received our perennial plugs to start in containers.  I get to see each and every perennial that comes in and salivate over all of the types.  Davey did a GREAT job at picking out perennials this year.  Lots of color variations.  Also different types for dry areas and wet.  I gave him a hard time because this year, instead of going crazy with buying perennials, the plan was to save money for hardwood floors.  Not nearly as much fun, but something that needs to be done!  In the meantime, I am seeing beautiful roses and perennials that make my fingers itch to plant!  We also have a great selection of seeds for the garden, including a lot of heirloom varieties.  I plan on starting some plants when I return from the mountains.

This weekend the family is traveling to Silverthorne, CO for our best friend's wedding.  Our friend Gus and his fiance Stacey (whom I LOVE) will be tying the knot.  We have a winter storm coming in, so we're trying to figure out travel arrangements getting up there.  The plan was to leave the boys at home (they have school on Friday) and then have my parents pick them up on their way up on Saturday.  My aunt happens to be coming in from Kansas City on Friday, so she was planning on staying at our house Friday night with the boys.  I still have no idea if this will work, so I am biting my nails as I wait for the outcome.  Due to the weather, my aunt could be late (which would mean the boys would be on their own, which I don't like), and my mom and dad might not come to the wedding at all.  The boys HAVE to be there, so Brian is talking of driving back down on Saturday to get them, and then coming back up for the wedding!!  Yikes!!  The major part of the storm is on Friday, right when we're driving up there.  This could make for an exciting weekend!

Today the plan is getting pedicures with Stacey and then watching Riordan in his "Barnyard Moosical" at the school.  He has been singing the songs for months now and is so excited for tonight!!  I am hoping to take some video clips to share on my blog.  Brian will be attending Gus' bachelor party, so who knows when I will see him again....;)

As for my health update...all in all I am better.  I still cannot eat anything fried (which isn't much of a loss) and also extremely spicy foods cause me pain.  However, I am able to eat everything else without problems.  I am hoping that my doctor's idea of a supplement will help me digest foods easier, so my life gets back on track.  Seeing the chiropractor has completely gotten rid of the tingling and numbness in my hands and feet, and I now am on a every two week schedule to see him (although I made an appointment for today because I need to be readjusted after starting work...ha!)  I would like to ask the doctor how I can have pain exactly where my gallbladder USED to be, when it's not there anymore.  It's weird.

After the wedding is done, I am looking forward to my birthday (okay, celebrating it, not the actual number going up) and then it's Daegan's birthday.  Lots of things to look forward to in the upcoming months!!!

Getting to listen to Lauren :)

I had the pleasure of listening to Lauren Springer Ogden and her husband Scott Ogden speak at the Pro Green expo yesterday.  One of the things that I appreciate most about these two is the fact that they actually use PLANTS in their landscape.  Too often we are seeing a huge splurge on "outdoor living spaces" that include hardscapes without plants to soften the area up.  Now, I love some of the outdoor living spaces, and most people that know me know that I cannot wait to build our deck out in the back to be able to spend more time outdoors.  But to me, what is the point of having an outdoor space if there is nothing to look at?

Lauren and Scott (look at me, I'm using their first names!) have what I believe is a half acre in Fort Collins, Co.  When showing their slides, it looked over three acres because they have so many plants.  Their use of texture, color, new plants and old inspires me to keep doing what I am doing in my own yard, along with offering the advice to my friends to do the same.  Now, there isn't an ounce of grass (besides ornamentals) that I saw in their back yard.  Not everyone is willing to forgo grass.  However, they had plenty of gathering spaces within their yard to enjoy the sites.

Their key points were:

Putting plants first.
I explained a little about that above.  If you're going to provide an outdoor living space, provide the plants to go with it.  They said, "plants are partners in the design rather than subordinate to it". 

Gardening where you are
Plant plants that work where you are putting them!  Hot, dry areas...plant plants that will make it!  There is nothing more frustrating than to keep planting every year because you like a plant there, but it's not the right place for that particular plant.  If in doubt, ask!  It's amazing how adaptable plants are here in CO, but they aren't superhuman.  Find the plants right for the area.

Meeting climate challenges
Plant NATIVE.  We all like to try new things as gardeners, and it gives us a cheap thrill.  To have a successful garden, plant native plants that thrive with each other.  If you have a large budget, plant those new plants.  Otherwise, stick to the ones that have been around forever!

Celebrating sensuality
Plant a lot of one plant here and there.  Celebrate the light that we naturally get in Colorado in those late summers.  Have the plants play off of each other. Find plants that have , and plant them in a place that you can smell it!  Since we have cooler summers, find those plants that really show off their stuff in the late afternoons and evenings.  You will be rewarded!

Connecting with Oneself and others
Provide invitations in your garden.  Have a bench far off to invite people to go through the gardens.  Plant a large bush that people have to go beyond to see what's further in.

Provide plants that wildlife want to come to!  Bees, hummingbirds, butterflies, other birds.  This is a sanctuary for not only you, but for those that are living around you.

All in all, the shop was nothing that I hadn't heard before (I have read all of their books), but it enforces what I believe in as a designer.  Plant what works, use the spaces you have wisely, and don't just plant for yourself!

Where to start?

I will start with some awesome news, because I always love writing about positive things. My niece was born! Adilynne Laurel Hunter was born on January 19. She is beautiful, healthy, and quite the eater! I have had the opportunity to spend tons of time with her, and she already has me wrapped around her little finger. She has the screwing up the face in a pout before she starts crying, and I am seriously feeling for her parents. Who can resist a face like that??  I am enjoying being an aunt (again), and love having babies to hold without being the actual parent!  I even can be counted on being the diaper changer to give the parents a break! :)

I am still recovering from my surgery. All in all it was a pretty simple procedure.  I only have on owie that is healing (which is my bellybutton) because I was a candidate to do that type of laproscopic surgery.  I feel like I have this little owie and a HUGE stomach due to the fact that everything is still swollen.  The worse part of the actual aftermath of surgery was the gas pains that happen since they blow up your stomach with gas to get to all of your parts.  NOT something I would want to go through again.  I am healing.  Slowly.  Trying to take it easy because I still am getting tired by 2:00 p.m.  I've had some problems with digesting things still, which really pisses me off, but I am hoping that will get better. 

The new problem is, I have been having problems with pains in my legs, along with numbness and tingling.  I have been told time and time again that this has NOTHING to do with the surgery (which I finally believe) but am impatiently waiting to figure out what is going on with me.  I have started seeing a new chiropractor (whom I just love) and he is trying to figure it all out.  With the numbness is the fear that I might have Multiple Sclerosis and so I am having an MRI next month just to rule that out.  I am not too concerned about that. but still would like to have the test since my mom was diagnosed about this time in her life.  After seeing the chiro, I am seeing some changes (baby steps!) and am hoping I am on the road to recovery. 

I would like to feel normal again.  I would like to feel 34 rather than 70.  I cannot wait for the day that I wake up and don't have to take a pain reliever! Ha! 

I am attending the Pro Green Expo which gets me so excited to start back up at Picadilly.  We actually have a booth this year, and it's been fun hanging out with the crew again.  I have been a little disappointed in the classes this year, but I am a firm believer that if you gain ONE ounce of knowledge per day, it's a good day.  I have picked up some new things, and I am grateful for the opportunity that working at Picadilly gives me.  Tomorrow I get to hear Lauren Springer and her husband Scott do a lecture on Plant Driven Design.  I am so excited to hear what they have to say.  I hold both of them with the highest regard!  Both as designers and with their overwhelming knowledge they have of plants that work in Colorado.  Needless to say, I am way excited!

Other than these things, my life has been dull.  As I said, I'm taking it easy which is extremely hard for me.  I am usually running around the house with a million things to do, and I've been catching up on reading and movies the past couple of weeks.  It's a hard life.  ;)